Dear College Reps:
Stop sending me crap.
I know that this is a difficult concept for you to grasp. I know and appreciate that you want me to go to your school. I'm sure that you've got a whole panel full of smart, zany people just waiting to review my final as soon as you have my official ACT scores.
I appreciate your holiday wishes. I really do. But, in my ever-so-humble opinion, you needn't send me a two-foot full-color picture of your campus in winter in order to give me them. An email would suffice (though, to be honest, I won't read it. But it's the thought that counts).
I understand that your job is hard. Trying to make your school stick out from the dozens of others that I'm looking at. I'm glad that you think I'm worth the time, materials, and postage.
But enough is enough.
I mean, honestly. If I had a nickel for every useless postcard and letter I've been sent, maybe I'd actually be able to attend your school. I don't mind the occasional update on how things are going; in fact, I appreciate it. But a 6x4 postcard that just says "IMAGINE" or "BELOIT KNOWS" or "UNIQUE" is not going to make we want to come to your school. Especially if I get one every other day.
That is all.